I went a'travelin' for many reasons, but for one in particular - 'dventure! And what better frontier to set out exploring then the depths of these deep dark ol' water puddles some folks call ocean. From Chiang Mai I make my way southward to the small yet thrumming island of Koh Tao off the east coast of Thailand.
To get to this little island is a quest in itself. I stir up some clouds along a short flight from Chiang Mai to Bangkok, then hop on a sleeper-train from Bangkok to the southeastern coastal city of Chumphon, where I finally take a boat from Chumphon to Koh Tao. This, my friends, is the fabled thirty hour travel extravaganza!
I awake at about 4am after a two hour snooze in my narrow squeeze of a bed inside the sleeper-train. Being my second sleeper-train experience, this time I came readily equipped with a bottle of cheap-as-can-be SangSom rum to help sleep take me a little easier. Maybe too easy. It's nearly time to get off at my stop when I peel back the sheets to the unsettling sight of tiny rows of red marks speckling my feet and ankles like little active volcanic islands growing larger by the minute. I have known these angry spots before, only last time they were seen on my arm a couple thousand miles away in Europe, in a hostel dorm within the gothic city of Prague. They travel the world in their endless search for blood...Bedbugs.
The crime scene. It seriously looks like a morgue. A morgue full of bloodthirsty bedbugs!
The little bastard parasites are stealthy thieves of the night! They creep out to sap your blood and leave behind only their signature trail of itchy-as-hell red bite mark bumps. Like mosquito bites, only far itchier, and they stick with you for more than a week instead of just a couple days. Needless to say, I jump out of that bedbug infested terror chamber in a semi-inebriated fluster.
I look down to the floor of the lavatory train car next door only to see droves of fat little insects crawling along the floor. I don't think they are bedbugs, as bedbugs are usually so small they go undetected, but there were a whole lot of em, and they sure as hell aren't cuddly! Usually I'm totally cool with bugs, but when they go crawling up your skin to suck your blood out of ya while you're fast asleep - well that's where I draw the line!
Off the sleeper-train, onto the ferry
Now there is a light to the end of this insect ridden tunnel. I get the hell off that train and soon thereafter make my way onto a backpacker-filled ferry bound for my island destination. I pray the bedbugs haven't hitched a ride inside my backpack, which they are more than capable of doing. After a four hour journey along the sea an island pops up into view along the horizon and begins to grow before my eyes as the ferry approaches. Crystal clear, light blue waters ring around fine sandy beach and lazy leaning palms. The small body of land that rises from the water appears in series of low green peaks and rocky outcroppings. This place looks like the kind paradise you see when you close your eyes and think "island oasis".
From the port I walk along a backpacker-swollen main road towards my final destination: Big Blue Dive School. This place has a summer camp feel to it and will act as the base of operations during my stay. With dorm-room accommodation, a classroom, restaurant, and bar, this all encompassing place is where I will be spending most of my time as I learn how to be a fish.
The sun is blazing down without mercy and I'm ready to finally kick back and enjoy the beach. I bring out my little guitar and sit beside some sunbathing beauties to serenade them. All is well and the tanning babes are just beginning to take notice of my playing when out of nowhere a rooster dressed in an orange, black and green sheen pops out of the nearby beach-bushes and begins strutting around the sand, distracting the ladies from my glorious, melodious mating calls. That cocky bastard! No matter. The ocean water is warm like a summer swimming-pool, and the sand is fine like tanned flour. I am relaxation.
Just look at em, stealing all my thunder. Seems that some cocks are on a never ending quest for attention
Later that afternoon I attend the first short dive intro class led by Ollie, my British dive-master for the Open Water Course. He's tall, well spoken, and has an angular face with a pointed chin like some protagonist in an action cartoon. Tomorrow we will break into our scuba duba dive trainee teams and start learning some moves in the hazy saltwater pool.
Later that evening I find myself at a cozy street side restaurant pouring SangSom rum into my mixed-fruit smoothie under the table (no shame in saving a buck on a drink!). Here I also slurp down a fantastically tasty bowl of Tom Yum. This Thai soup has flavor out the yin-yang! Lemongrass, the Thai ginger-esk root called galangal that has powerful menthol and spicy qualities to it, plus onions, mushrooms and shrimp tossed in to provide some heartiness. I first tried Tom Yum in Chiang Mai and was completely unaware that the herbs and ginger were meant to flavor the soup, not to be consumed with a grimaced face and the thought of "Man, Thai people really eat this stuff? Ya, it's not so bad...I can do this." running through my mind. In this case, no, they don't really eat that stuff. You learn pretty quick out here! I still eat the lemongrass sometimes, don't tell anyone I told you though.
It's late at night now, and I rest soundly in my lower bunk bed of the tidy six-person dorm room. Earlier in the day I had borrowed some anti-bedbug spray from a friendly British PE teacher on the boat to the island. My bag is surely bedbug free! In the depths of my carefree slumber I slowly stir awake. At the foot of my bed my leg is a bit itchy. Just the bedbug bites asking for attention. But wait - under the thin white sheet my leg is being tickled by...something. In the stifling darkness I tear off the sheet with a great whoosh. Simultaneously something big, fat and dark scurries off my leg and up along the side of my bed - towards my face (which is contorted in horror). I can hear it scurry.
I leap out of bed like the mattress is about to burst into flames but keep my cool and don't make so much as a peep. I don't want to awaken the three other guys still sleeping nearby, safe inside their respective dreamlands. I proceed to scan the scene with my phone light for who the hell knows what. Something plump and many-legged and so very eager to cuddle up with me. After searching for a while without finding a thing I reluctantly return to the scene of the unknown terror, climb back into bed, and attempt to fall back asleep.
This is what I found under the bed in the morning:
No comments :
Post a Comment